So, parents, do you think you effect your teens self-esteem?
“Hello, My name is Liz and my grandmother bought the book “My Feet Aren’t Ugly” for me after my mom sent me the link to your website. I am wondering if you have any suggestions about how to talk to a parent that is lowering my self esteem by trying to make me be the person they want me to be and not allowing me to be myself? . Thank you and have a nice day.
When I’m helping teens develop their self-esteem, the parents play a huge part in that development. It’s important for parents to allow their kids to be who they are and not who they want them to be. I also mentor women of all ages and the biggest wounding they have from their childhood is that they are not good enough. This wound of “I’m not good enough” can certainly stem from a parent not excepting who their child is.
What is it about your teens that triggers you and makes you fearful if they aren’t being who you think they should be? Instead of looking at your teen and asking her to be someone else, that makes you feel comfortable, ask yourself, why it bothers you for her to be who she is. This is her journey, and she will learn from walking her path herself, not having you walk it and tell her how to walk it. It just doesn’t work that way. Love your teen for exactly who she is-not as driven as you, dresses differently than you think she should, maybe she is gay, etc. Love her as she is. Loving her for who she is will help her become a more confident young adult, isn’t this what we want as parents?
Keep Loving yourself, Debra