For generations, teens have been cultivating a reputation for attitude problems and selfishness. While there are always exceptions to any rule, most teens will suffer through some difficulties at some point in their development. They may even come across as cold and uncaring. Those who are parenting teens can help conquer this problem by promoting empathy.

What is Empathy?

Empathy is a state of relating to the feelings or motivations of another living being. Without it, the world would be chaotic. While it might seem that society is lacking empathy due to the murders, robberies and terrorist acts we commonly see on the evening news, the fact is that most people, teenagers included, do possess empathy. However, without the proper guidance from the adult influences in their life, this natural empathy might not be enough to outweigh the intense feelings most teens experience throughout adolescence.

Why Do Teens Seem to Lack Empathy?

The teenage years are meant for exploring, challenging and discovering. The teen brain develops in a way that allows for bold moves without a lot of consideration for the consequences. This gives teens the freedom to try new things and push the envelope, but it can also get them into trouble.

How Can Those Parenting Teens be of Assistance?

1. Point out How Behavior Affects Others When you discuss the happenings in your teen’s social life, be sure to point out how behavior affects others. It’s important that your teen feels you will always be on his or her side, but that doesn’t mean you should let negative behavior slide. Instead, help your teen navigate through life’s dramas by making assertive, compassionate choices. 2. Encourage Volunteer Work Taking part in charity work is great for teens. Not only does it encourage empathy, but it also looks great on college applications. If you need ideas, look up your local homeless shelters, food drives or animal rescue centers. 3. Help Define Boundaries Boundaries are the key to healthy relationships. Promoting empathy is a crucial part of parenting teens, but you don’t want to go too far in the other direction. Sometimes teens who get caught up in abusive relationships will over empathize with their partner, putting his or her needs above their own. When teaching empathy, remind your teen that self-care is just as important as caring for others. Without a balance between the two, it's difficult to have a healthy and happy life. Keep Loving Yourself, Debra If you want your teen to be more understanding, check out my award winning book, My Feet Aren't Ugly, A Girl's Guide To Loving Herself From The Inside Out. Amazon.com

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Debra Beck