How Much Influence Parents Have in an Indirect way.

Indirect Parental Influence: Is Your Behavior Harming Your Teen? How Much Influence Parents Have in an Indirect way

Too many parents expect their kids to be perfect without taking a moment to examine their own behavioral patterns. You might not realize it, but your kids are always paying attention to everything you say and do. Everything from the way you speak to others to the way you handle discipline is going to affect the way your child sees the world.

You’ve always done your best to teach your child proper behavior. You knew you didn’t want to deal with teen issues later, so you taught your kids to be gracious, courteous and kind. It might seem that you did your job as a parent, but unless you practice what you preach, you might be sending the wrong message to your kids.

The Art of Indirect Influence

It’s natural for children to mimic the actions and behaviors of the people they grow up around. How else can they be expected to learn about the world? The problem is that adults aren’t perfect either, and you can’t expect yourself to be. What you can do is hold yourself to a high standard and learn to control your emotions, which will both improve your own life and provide a better influence for your kids.

Staying Cool Under Pressure

If you want to effectively communicate rather than face an onslaught of teen issues every time you try to speak, controlling your own reactions is key. Your teen is going to say a lot of things that might anger you, but if you can avoid showing your temper, the entire situation will remain calm. Do your best to listen to what your teen is trying to express to you, and ask questions if you aren’t sure. Staying cool and remaining engaged with a person in the middle of an emotional outburst is an important life skill. Begin teaching it to your kids now, and if you find yourself struggling, don’t be afraid to step away, breathe and regain your center before continuing the conversation.

For more help with staying calm and dealing with teen issues, please contact me today.  I offer mother daughter retreats and mentoring that can help parents stay mindful and in control as they navigate the tough waters of the teenage years.


Call me at  928-300-0447 or

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Debra Beck

Would you like to improve your teens self esteem or your relationship with your teen check out my 2 Online programs



My Feet Aren't Ugly book by Debra Beck.

If you want your teen to have a better sense of self, check out my award winning book, My Feet Aren’t Ugly, A Girl’s Guide To Loving Herself From The Inside Out.

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