The popularity of the hit Netflix show “13 Reasons Why” has brought a very important discussion about teen depression to dinner tables around the country. The show has been criticized for its graphic imagery and serious subject matter, but many parents are thankful. In a world where teen suicide is frighteningly common, parents want to know how they can help.

All teens get moody now and again. Teen self esteem is always a struggle, and the high-school years tend to come with plenty of ups and downs. It’s so normal for teens to be down in the dumps that many parents don’t notice the warning signs of depression and suicide.

1. Changes in Sleeping or Eating Habits

If you notice your teen losing weight, having difficulty finishing meals or suddenly feeling overly concerned with her weight or appearance, it might be time to sit down and talk. Major changes in appetite are a sign that something is wrong. It could be depression, an eating disorder or even a sign of drug or alcohol use. The same goes for sleeping habits. Teens typically love to stay up late and sleep in, but things like never sleeping at night or having trouble waking up for school could indicate that your teen is pulling away from the world.

2. Issues with Pain

Does your teen regularly complain of headaches, stomachaches or other minor problems that her doctors can find no cause for? Complaints about pain can be a sign that a teen is so unhappy in school that she’s looking for a reason to stay home. Your teen also might be experiencing legitimate pain that comes from stress or depression. An ongoing low mood has physical consequences, and you don’t want to let the problem go on without treatment.

3. Something Being “Off”

You’re her mother. Maybe you can’t put your finger on it, but you know when something isn’t right. If your daughter isn’t opening up to you, try spending some dedicated time with her. A mother-daughter retreat is a great way to get away from distractions and focus on improving teen self esteem.