Most parents don’t look forward to talking to their teens about dating. The conversation has the potential to make many awkward turns, from discussing the importance of condoms to attempting to explain the ins and outs of dating when you might not even understand them yourself.
However, if you wait too long to start discussing these things, you might wake up one morning and realize your teen is already dating. Sometimes having a teen mentor to help you through these tough times helps.
1. Don’t Try to Protect Them
Some parents will avoid the dating and sex discussion because they fear that hosting an open forum on such topics will indicate that they are encouraging the idea. It makes sense, but in reality, your kids are most likely going to be enticed by the dating world regardless of what advice you give them. However, without your advice, they will be a lot more clueless about what they should or shouldn’t do.
2. Start Early
Experts agree that it’s important for parents to discuss dating with their teens sooner rather than later. The earlier you do this, the more deeply ingrained these ideas about healthy dating will become. Your goal should be to have the discussion prior to your son or daughter’s first relationship. Many parents will wait for their teens to come to them with questions, but if you do, it might be too late to influence your teen in a positive way. Remember, if your teen doesn’t learn about dating and sex from you, his or her peers will provide their own education, which might be riddled with misconceptions.
3. Be Realistic
Kids are growing up fast these days thanks to the prevalence of sexuality in mainstream pop culture. It’s common for today’s children and teens to be a bit more aware, which means that parents need to step it up. Since these concepts are so readily available to kids, parents need to approach the subject with the same level of openness. Attaching stigma or shame to dating or sexual activities will create even more confusion for your teen. If you feel uncomfortable, your teen might feel uncomfortable coming to you with questions or concerns. As difficult as it might be, try to relax and approach the conversation naturally.
The most important thing to remember is to treat your teen with respect. You’re dealing with young adults, and as naive and silly as they can be, you must take them seriously. When teens feel that they are being treated as intelligent individuals, not only will it be easier for them to open up, but they’ll also be more likely to listen to what you have to say.
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If you want your teen to be more understanding, check out my award winning book, My Feet Aren’t Ugly, A Girl’s Guide To Loving Herself From The Inside Out. Amazon.com
